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Showing posts with label ayat untuk lelaki. Show all posts
Showing posts with label ayat untuk lelaki. Show all posts

Monday, January 30, 2017

It's hard to trust a man, doc.

Assalamualaikum.

Masih teringat lagi, masa tu my doctor tumpangkan naik kereta sama on the way after kerja.
Follow by another doctor.
And i'm sat at the back just be a good passenger.
Lots of topic we discuss.
About no makes sense of hospital charges, related to decrease of cases, and new technology in medical too.
Rasa matured ya amat bila cakap pasal itu semua.
Layan je la.

And one moment, they asked me about my personal part.
Jodoh things.
Time tu actually rasa macam nak bukak tingkap.
And terjun ke luar.
I don't care if we are still on the busy road.

"Why not you find your own abang, adibah?"

After few deep breaths, i replied.
It's hard to trust a man, doc.
Pretty hard.

And they both nods and silence for few minutes.


Not said i traumatized dengan semua lelaki.
I grew with three weird brothers and a good father.
My relationship with them are good.
Because i trust mereka in my life.
Siblings goal.

But now, if you dare me to put a trust, a perfect trust to a man yang akan pegang title my husband.
It's a pretty high risk.
Tak kiralah dia kelak included as my annoying friends list or new strangers.
Trust is impossibly be easy.
Am i right?

But my doc said, why not i open my heart and give myself an opportunities.
Kenal hati budi among them, and choose the best.
I not replied back.

Because my doc don't understand me.
Like i said before, It's hard to trust a man.
If you said about peluang.
I can give all the man a thousand even billions of peluang to makes my life better and happy.
But at the end, when we wants to take a next steps.
I will questioning myself, can i put a trust to him likes i trust my four favorite person in this world?
Which i donno i even can trust myself too in this things
It's not gonna be easy as 1, 2, 3 duh.

Then i know.
The real solution to my problem is to find a man i can trust on.
That's it.
Trust i give for routinely small matter or in my big decision.

That i want when he received it, he appreciate it.
Likes a pure innocent magically touch in everything.
Because i don't forever live in fairy tale land.
I want us to be real.
Ceeewah.
Gitu.


And about balasan balik, i don't really need his own trust for me.
Just my trust for him is a good enough.
It's just my psycho dynamic things.
Really!
If dia nak fair square with me in this situation. It's great!
Two is better than one.
Hehhehhe....

Alright, see you in the next trust?
= )

End of 2023

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